How to solve any problem in my life and gain control over the situation?

I would like to share with you a model that helps you to solve any problem in your life its called ABCDE model.

How to solve any problem in my life and gain control over the situation?

I would like to share with you a model that helps you to solve any problem in your life its called ABCDE model. This was devised by Albert Ellis- an American psychologist, in the 1950s, to be used in Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy. The model helps break down incidents into small steps, and the person starts to gain control over the situation by understanding his thoughts, emotions, and why he reacted in a certain way. This model is empowering.

The components of the model are also the stages for coaching using this model-

A = Activating event (any event incident that triggers a negative emotion or behavior)

B = Belief system (beliefs held by the person, which can be uncovered by enquiring about the thoughts, including cognitive distortions)

C = Consequences of the activating event, mostly emotional (like anger, sadness, rage)

D = Disputing irrational thoughts and beliefs (challenging the cognitive distortions and other irrational beliefs)

E = Energizing. Cognitive and Emotional effects of revised beliefs (Result of challenging irrational beliefs on emotions, thoughts, and behavior leading to new positive beliefs)

Plan for the execution of the ABCDE model-  

Sit in a comfortable position and think about one problem incident (A) which was upsetting. Note down thoughts (ask "What were your thoughts at that time? What were you telling yourself?), and emotions 

To get to the core beliefs behind those thoughts (B), ask "what will happen if (mentioning the incident, like failing an exam). You might have to do this repeatedly to get to the deepest core belief. 

Example:

Your Inner:   I could not prepare for the interview, I think I'll be rejected.

You:             what would happen if you got rejected?

Your Inner:   I will be jobless

You:             what would happen if you were jobless?

Your Inner:   I will not be able to fit in with the society

You:             so what will happen?

Your Inner: I will feel I am not worthy of anything

(Here, the core belief is- to be worthy, I need to fit in with the society)

You will see that the consequence (C) or behavior of the person was most often not due to the incident, but because of the beliefs held. Therefore, B (and not A) causes C.

Challenge these beliefs (D), and create positive, solid affirmations (E)